Glory Hom – Rest in the Lord

After the 2nd Cord Blood Transplant
[http://jgospel.net/glory]

12th Day of Transplant (9/18/2007)
今(昨?)天早上四點半便到醫院，很奇怪文筠一見到我就說要帶上新買的那個假髮, 我安慰她遲些日子再給你戴吧，在病房你又不需走來走去, 出院後再給你，她又跟我講起她的日記, 都是記載一 些吾開心的日子,我安慰她這廿二年來我們一家都有很多很開心的日子,過去這八年你雖然痛苦地與癌症鬥了那麼多次,但當中難道就沒有開心的日子嗎！你在大學 生活不開心嗎？她答：當然開心啦！我說媽媽今天上班,明天後天都請了假便來便來看你，她突然問我,我過到今天嗎？我心中有數,打個電話給她媽媽,在電話中媽媽 跟她說：Glory I love you, 她也回答: Mom, I love you too. 很自然沒有半點做作，這句話就是她與我們所講最清楚一句末了的話, 媽媽一聽她聲音直覺上已告知不妙,立刻再請假趕來醫院,真的她洗腎一小時後血壓太低,醫生群入來急救,發覺連她呼吸都很困難,推超音波來檢測心臟情況,發 覺心臟已因藥物與化療的毒性傷害了,只剩下２０﹪的功能，醫生也說吸呼器只能暫時幫助她呼吸, 最終仍必會停頓。她的腎臟失效, 肝臟失效今天連心臟都失效.他們急救時本應趕我們家人出房, 但她一直叫著要Daddy. Daddy因只有我可給她安慰與平静, 他們都特准我與太太全程在她身旁, 我握著她的手, 摸著她的頭安慰她才平靜下來, 看到醫護們的神情, 我知他們都盡力想救她, 但看到文筠所受的折磨, 心如刀割, 自問難道真的如此要她接受無止境折磨嗎?

到 了半夜兩點半她的血壓不斷下降, 終於她的血壓. 心跳完全停止, 時間是清晨四點五十五分, 看著病床上的顯示幕, 心跳. 血壓等都成一直線, 忍不住淚水也直流, 我握著她的手一直送她走完她在地上的人生路. 記得她出生時我抱著她輕摸著她頭帶她離開醫院, 今天我也是輕摸著她的頭送她離開世界,她安息主懷, 在那裏再無眼淚, 再無痛苦, 她短暫的一生實在是神的榮耀.
明天安排好她殯儀之事便告知你們, 謝謝你們一直關心文筠, 為她不斷的禱告.

I arrived at the hospital at 4:30 am this (yesterday?) morning. I was surprised that Glory asked to put her on her wig when she saw me. I comforted her, saying it was not necessary since she was going nowhere, and that she could always put it on when she leaves the hospital. She chatted with me about her diary, what she jotted down was mostly 'the unhappy times'.
I comforted her, "We, as a family had some great times together over the last 22 years. Although for the past 8 years, you have been battling with cancer, I am sure there are some good times too? Don't you enjoy you college life?"

"Of course I do," she replied.

"Mom is working today. But she will take tomorrow and the day after off to come see you..."
Suddenly she responded, "Will I be able to pull through another day?"

I knew what she meant. I put Emily on the phone, her mom told her, "Glory, I love you."

Glory replied very naturally with no pretense, "Mom, I love you too."

This was the last clear sentence she uttered to us. Emily instinctly knew the moment might have come. She took off from work and came to the hospital. One hour after Glory's dialysis, her blood pressure dropped tremendously, she had difficulty breathing. Doctors rushed in with all sorts of equipment only to find that the poisonous effects of radiation left her heart with 20% capacity to function. The doctors could only help her breathe with the machine, eventually her breathing would stop.

Her kidney failed, her liver failed, and now her heart failed.

Usually we are not allowed to stay when doctors resuscitated her. But she was calling Daddy, Daddy. Only I could give her the comfort she needed. They allowed Emily and I to be with her throughout. I held her hands and stroke her head. She calmed down. By the looks of the medical team, I knew they tried their best, but when I saw Glory's suffering, my heart ached, do I really want her to go on like this?

By 2:30am, her blood pressure was dropping continuously, until her heart beat stopped, it was 4:55am. The monitor screen by her bedside flat-lined. I wept. I held her hand all the way to the end of her life's path. When she was born, I held her, stroking her head gently when we left the hospital. Today, once again, I stroke her head gently as I sent her along to rest in the arms of the Lord, a place where there is no more tears, no more suffering. Her short lived life is indeed God's glory.

I will let you know when her funeral arrangement is in place. Thank you for your love, your concern and your prayers for Glory.